We don't know how to date and it shows : A rant?

Hey guys, Happy Bachelor Monday!! I hope you’ve all been wonderful the past like 100 years since I wrote last and I really hope that you all survived the mushy celebratory and marketable day of love last week! I for one, tried to shower those I love with love, despite my being super single this year with no one to love ON.

Valentine’s day is obviously a cheesy holiday, I promise it doesn’t make you any more cool to state that and protest against the cuteness, okay? Of course it’s tacky - it’s a day filled with pink, hallmark cards and candy! But I will always love love no matter how enormous the teddy bear or obnoxious the card, and I am all about the cheesy stuff any day of the year especially if it’s in the form of gift-giving which is definitely one of my love languages. Ultimately, it’s all positive vibes and happy cheese unless you’re heartbroken so at the end of the day, I’d rather embrace Valentine’s day than hate on it single or not ya know? I actually promised this blog post would be out BEFORE Valentine’s Day but here we are, happy belated ha!

I’ve been away from this blog of mine for a while, like a long, loonng while… but I’ve been truly SO busy working on school and my future and that definitely qualifies as a solid excuse. The good news is that with some very recent, pretty excited changes going on in my life, I finally feel motivated and actually able to find time to sneak in a post or two!

The next time I write after this will hopefully be an “updated update”, a post that’s relevant to my life today and can hopefully serve as inspiration for some of ya’ll who might need a reminder to really focus on self-discovery and soul searching. Most of all, that post will be about not being so fearful of change as long as you’re following your heart. Look out for that, it’s just on hold while I wait on some things to get sorted out before I share!!

In the meantime, we’re gonna talk a whole lot about dating and love and sex and being single and all the good stuff, cause ladies and gents we really don’t know what the hell we’re doing anymore. Myself included. So, here goes nothin’.

“DATING” IN THE 21ST CENTURY…AS A 20 SOMETHING YEAR OLD (or…not dating and just being single ha)

K. Let’s be real with each other. We’re all guilty, we’re all the problem, we’re all at fault. Dude our parents look at us like we’re nuts because…we ARE. We, this generation, this CRAZY generation, have lost all sight of what’s important, what to prioritize, what to look for, what to put up with, how to talk to each other, how to flirt properly and not be creepy or pushy or forward…how to FIND all of that in one person that doesn’t completely, entirely fucking SUCK. I mean seriously, I can count on one hand…maybe a hand and a half???… the amount of friends I have that are sincerely, happily, completely in loving, healthy relationships at our age. For those friends, I couldn’t be happier, more at peace and more hopeful for and of their love and their luck being a 20-somethin’ year old in a successful relationship. I am so happy for those who seem to have it figured out and I cannot wait to be at or in ya’lls weddings BUT for this post specifically in the most loving way possible, you’re excluded.

Sorry, I love you my dear friends-in love but you probably got roses and sex on Valentine’s Day so I’m not that sorry. This post is for those of us who are currently so single we bought ourselves peanut butter cups for Valentine’s Day and contemplated redownloading tinder for the evening.

My single millenial readers, what the actual EF are we doing!? We’re sliding into people’s DM’s (yes, I do this too), downloading dating apps to swipe left and right on mostly creepy random people we’ll never meet, then we find someone and we’re SERIOUSLY using “nah it’s not like that, we’re just talking” “no we’re not together it’s just like a thing” as an EXCUSE to walk all over people and date multiple at a time?!?! “We” are fearful of commitment, fearful of rejection, fearful of pure interaction and confrontation! Fearful of saying our feelings, expressing ourselves, being HONEST. Ya’ll…it’s so bad that we’re quite literally dropping off the face of the earth and leaving people completely hanging by GHOSTING (as if this should even be a term at all) them and never giving them any explanation or closure.

What we’re not doing a whole lot of is falling in love, telling those people we love that we love them and SHOWING it, giving closure, communicating, respecting, meeting people authentically. The list goes on. Personally, since this is my blog and I am only able to speak for myself….I will of course share my perspective and my lessons learned…but I (as always) would love to hear yours. Let’s sulk together.

For a lot of my 23 years on this planet I have been in relationships by choice. I’m a relationship girl at heart, I like bonding with people, making close connections, having someone to confide in and hang out with and love on. I’ve never been one to just hook up with someone and never talk to them again. I don’t really drink at all, so sloppy one-night-stands really aren’t a thing I do a lot of and in the past 6-8 months I’ve really done a whole lot of nothing as far as dating goes. I still believe in love whole-heartedly, though. And I am quite impatiently longing for the day I get to be in it again.

I have been in love two times that I can count on for sure, so I know it exists and I know that I want it again.

  1. First was my “young love”. I dated the same guy most of my high school career and luckily he was the sweetest, kindest and most hardworking guy in my town, I swear. I was a smart teenager, guys. I somehow seemed to know more about character and love then. I guess at 14 years old, I knew what was good for me, and that was him. We grew up together essentially as best friends, attached at the hip and we really loved each other. Young love of course, but love nevertheless. I absolutely, admittedly think about him very often, even now. He’s out there somewhere happily in love with a new girl (as far as I know) and we haven’t seen each other in years, but I would hope that he knows that I will always have a special place in my heart for him. We’re strangers now, but my 14 year-old self loved him too deeply to forget.

  2. The second I’ve been sure of was my first “adult love”. I met a guy at 18 and he was 25. Older, cooler, unique, hard to get to. Of course all of these aspects made it THAT much more fun. I was intrigued from the jump and I was in trouble from day one. From that point on…literally…he was in my life for 4-5 years in one way or another and we eventually, in a very round-about and unhealthy way, fell in love. Madly, obsessively, stupidly in love. I 100% thought I would marry him, and I was aware he had a proposal planned. However I was not being treated well at all and I was forced to choose between him and the rest of the people in my life, including myself. Luckily in the end, I knew better and I learned a lot.

It’s been about 17 months since that point in my life and boy, has a lot changed. Except, through it all, I haven’t lost hope or faith in love. Since choosing me, I’ve spent some time by myself, some time with some amazing men and some not so amazing boys. I’ve dated around a bit and I’ve admittedly spent a couple hours on the dating apps we all love to hate…including Instagram cause that’s my app of choice. Had small successes, met some cool people, went on some dates, texted some guys. I was treated well and treated poorly, used my brain and used my heart. I think ultimately, the past year-ish, dating just hasn’t been my top priority and that is why I’m single and that is so okay. My priority has absolutely, undoubtedly, selfishly been myself.

After being so deeply, passionately in love and watching it cripple me and dissolve in front of my eyes, love became a little bit scary and unattainable soon after. Although I’ve never stopped wanting it, my view on it just changed over some time. It’s still something I want, something we should all want and something that is worth having…I’m just more choosey with who I want to be in love with.

I think I’ve caught glimpses since, I know that I’ve seen potential. I think I’ve been loved since, and I know I’ve been taken advantage of just the same. When you’re young and you’re single, you’re bound to experience a little bit of everything. It’s all in the game.

Keeping myself as a priority has been crucial to healing from my last love. People often ask me how I got over my adult break up, what I did to stay so “calm”, what I did to heal…and my response is always the same. Time. Support. Distraction. Staying busy. Allowing myself to feel whatever it is I feel. In short, know that no matter what, you’ll come out stronger, better and more capable of loving than you were before.

HOWEVER what I can’t seem to offer is advice on how to survive as a single girl AFTERWARD. Cause girl, I don’t know. This single world is weird, we’re all so out of touch and glued to our phones and reliant on looks, bios and sex. Ever since I’ve been single, I feel so lost lol.

For the past 6ish months I’ve been the MOST single I think I’ve ever been in my life! The more I creep away from being in a relationship, the more I miss being in one… a real one. And the more that sadly… I lose hope and realistic sight in finding someone I really want that with again!

Where the hell are the good ones?! If you are one, lemme know lol.

I’ve definitely become much more picky in who I pay any mind to, I definitely have some walls up, I’m more cautious, I’m more aware, I’m a little more selfish. And honestly I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. I think that comes with experience and age and lessons learned.

But what if you wanna find someone?! What if we get sick of being single? What if the one person I keep picturing myself with probably doesn’t feel the same way? Where do we go?! Where do we turn to? How do we meet someone who wants what we want? How do we know who to trust or who to commit to? How do you compete with the instagram models your ex likes on IG, the beauty standards, the shallow expectations of most single people? Especially in today’s warped world…

We’re in our 20’s, we’re young, we’re hormonal, we’re horny, we’re energized, we’re freakin BORED, we have all the time in the world, we’re probably hot….you’re hot. I’m telling ya you’re hot…so what’s the problem? Why are we single and how do we change it if we want to?! Is it even okay to be single? I feel like everyone is married or engaged…or having KIDS! Ya’ll.

“Oh well who meets the love of their life at a bar?”

“Oh those stupid dating apps are so shallow and so pointless, everyone just wants to hook up”

“Oh well college boys are too young and immature”

“Guys our age are still so shallow, I need an older man”

“He’s too nice, he’s too mean, he’s a hoe, she’s a hoe, he or she is too this, too that”

Ok girl or guy, or whoever you are…what are we waiting for then? What are we banking on? Are we just gonna stay at home and hope this soulmate of ours just falls from the sky and/or breaks into our house while we’re bingeing Netflix?

I want to have hope again. I want to imagine and know that I will fall in love again someday with someone worth my time and love and energy. Someone who will treat me well and make me laugh and have ambitions and goals and dreams. Someone who will support me and love me through all of the ups and downs. Someone who loves kids, and is accepting and nonjudgemental and open minded and progressive. Someone who respects my wishes, opinions, dreams, beliefs, and vice-versa.

I know as well as you do that we ALL have so much to offer someone who wants what we want. And even if that’s just something casual, even if that’s just a hookup, at least we have more to give than what we’re receiving right now. And at least we could open our hearts and our minds and our MOUTHS and communicate that with each other so that we are all on the same page.

I’m soo tired of wanting and waiting for this miracle to happen, wanting so desperately to meet someone so authentically in a coffee shop or book store or out to dinner with some friends. That’s how it’s supposed to happen, right? THAT is the circumstance in which it works and you fall in love at first sight and you flash forward 5 years and you’re married with a babe on the way or some cute shit like that! Those are the times when it happens, when you least expect it or when you weren’t looking. So you delete the dating apps and you avoid talking to people for longer than a few minutes at a bar and you start doing your makeup a little bit fancier to go study at Starbucks…right? That’s how it happens?

So then why are we all still so single and so so so desperate for attention from other people? So on the “hunt” for love that we’re swiping for it? What if we’re just supposed to be patient and wait and STOP searching? Stop swiping, stop looking, stop yearning, stop hoping. Maybe we just wait and it’ll happen when it happens and when it does we’ll just know. Patience is a virtue. We all need to work on that.

I say we wait as long as we have to because when you do fall in love, it’s so worth the wait. Even if it’s not your last time falling in love, it still changes your life completely. And maybe it is the last time and maybe we will meet the love of our life, or maybe we already have but we need to accept it and go after it and stop being so scared to fail or lose or break. Love is the closest thing we have to magic, and that’s why it’s sometimes so hard to find.

My hope for us, dating in our 20’s in this day in age when the internet provides us access to the world at our fingertips and you can stalk your ex on instagram and you can swipe to match with the hottest person possible…my hope is that amongst all of that temptation and “fun”, we still make sure to recognize our worth, acknowledge our flaws and our strengths, respect others and communicate our feelings and intentions. No one is perfect, you wouldn’t want to be, but there is someone perfect for you, and you’re perfect for someone and THAT is why all the cheese that is Valentine’s day is fun when you’re a believer in love.

As hard as it is for me and for you and for all of us, we must see past the surface, ask questions, speak our minds and be open to the idea that not everyone is awful and not everyone is your ex. I think we can have it all, if we just adjust our way of viewing love and dating. It’s not a rush, it’s not always a game, and people are people and we all want the same thing. With your phone in your hand and your heart on your sleeve, open your eyes and your heart and your mind and talk to each other! I hope we all still believe in love and don’t give up complete hope that it’s out there for all of us…no matter how weird and contorted we’ve made the journey to find it.

We’re so weird, guys. This generation is so weird. But we’re also so smart, so beautiful and so powerful. We have loud, passionate voices and we have things to say and people who want to hear us. We have platforms like THIS BLOG, social media sites, college campuses, youtube, we have places to share our thoughts and ideas and wishes and hopes, and yet so many of us are afraid to share! Afraid to connect, afraid to talk, afraid to go for it. Love still exists, even if you’ve been broken before. Love still exists even if you’re not in it right now. Love still exists even if it’s not in the way you imagined it. Love still exists even if it’s hard to find. Love still exists but it doesn’t come without effort and it doesn’t come without patience. Nothing worth having comes easy, and hey…maybe it’s already right in front of your eyes.

Open them! You’re worthy of the chance to love and be loved. Don’t fight it off, don’t hunt for it, don’t push it away. It should be easy and it should be worth it.

This was like one giant rant that probably didn’t even make sense, but I still have so much to say. Except I want to say it to you, WITH you! SO, please share your love stories with me! Share your weird first-date horror stories, breakup stories, share your opinions on dating in this day-in-age, with these weird apps and social standards and expectations. Tell me what you think, how you feel, what you struggle with. Let’s start the conversation because I think we’re the only ones who understand what it’s like to be dating and single in our 20’s, in 2019, in the Instagram-perfect world. Whatever you wanna tell me, I’m all ears! Let’s be single together until we’re not. Deal?

Happy Valentine’s Day, guys, maybe next year we’ll all be in love again ;)

Love you.

xoxo, Kayla

Photo: @Emily Savage

Photo: @Emily Savage

(No longer current) An Update

Been a whole month, or so, huh? If you're reading this, thanks for still tuning in and caring enough to read whatever words I decide to write on the internet today. 

You know what's so weird? It's absolutely bizarre to think that I have this public blog that I advertise & promote on my personal accounts and in my every day, yet I ultimately have NO idea who is reading it...or if anyone is. Besides of course, the beautiful people that continuously shock me in mentioning that they read  every post I write. (Usually the MOST unexpected people) But there's this excitement, this fear and high that comes with the mystery and anonymity in my readers. Just another reason I adore having a platform or two or TEN on the internet. (On the real though, SIDE NOTE - anyone here see or maybe vote on my poll the other day, regarding whether or not I should start a YouTube Channel? It'd be an extension of this blog, going hand-in-hand. A KaylaLinda "She, You, Woman" channel. I'll make an entire post about this possibility soon..but lemme know your thoughts before then, por favor!) 

There is so much power and excitement in public expression and social media, but ya'll know this already, I ramble about it daily! Anywhooooo, whoever you are, wherever you are, stranger, old love interest, lonely soul, ex, best friend, family member, coworker, acquaintance, IG follower, whoever...please know that I appreciate you, so so much. No matter how long I go without writing here. 

Alrighty let's see...an update on ME, as a keepsake and reminder for my future self and the place I stood today, in May of 2018. 

Since I last wrote here, I've  

1. Spontaneously, courageously, VERY LATE AND PASSED DEADLINES, applied, interviewed and got accepted into grad school. HALLELUJAH!

2. Reconnected with and tried to date again with an incredible man and then decided I just simply wasn't ready for it. Not a shocker, to say the least. 

3. So, once again, am very single - for ya'll nosey asses lol

4. Have started venturing out into new online business ventures and opportunities seeing as the summer is coming, and soon I'll be a very busy, very broke grad student lol. Might as well use my blog and social media for more than my own pleasure, right?!

GRAD SCHOOL

So yes, grad school! Yet another FIRST day of school is about to be here in the blink of an eye! I will begin at the end of August, as a full time student in a School Psychology program. I am so excited, and really feel like this is the right path for me. I've worked next to our school psych for the past 7 months or so, and that's where I started to realize that this career could be something I would not only excel at, but love forever. I am so stoked for school, I feel ready and prepared to do well, work hard and LEARN more than I ever thought possible. I can't wait to shop for school supplies again, nerdvillllleeeeee! 

CALIFORNIA

When I graduate in a few years, (yes I like to plan ahead, nothing wrong with working towards and looking forward to something!) my plan and wish would be to throw a huge party, pack up my car, and take off with my mom and pup on a road trip across country to move my butt to Southern California.

I've talked a lot with mom about this idea, and she's all for it, per usual. She's always so supportive of my wild plans, and I am forever grateful for that. Of course, grad school will be consuming my life for the next 3 years, so my plans and desires could change by then. I also have my fears and doubts about being far from family and friends again, because of how deeply I missed them when I was on Oahu, but I've always been told not to let that hold me back from where I feel my soul really belongs. SoCal isn't as far as Hawaii, I can be home in 5 hours if I need or want to be, and it's in the lower 49 so I feel safe with that, haha!

If you know me at all, you know my heart and soul truly longs and belongs close to the Pacific Ocean, in the sun, on the beach, surrounded by art, warmth and free spirits. The comforting part about this plan is that by the time I graduate, I'll be a certified and licensed psychologist, ready, able and more than qualified to get a GOOD job in a GOOD school system in California, or anywhere my heart desires, for that matter. So I won't be lost, no matter where I decide to start my adult journey. To make sure I make all the right moves for MYSELF, I'll probably be planning a trip or 2 to LA and San Diego this year and maybe next, which excites me beyond measure. I haven't gone anywhere since Arizona, and ya girl is in serious & desperate need of a trip to the West Coast. I never thought I'd be saying this - as an anxious, hot mess with anxiety over everything, ESPECIALLY flying...but I got so used to flying so often, that I just really want to get on a plane again. SOON. I'm itching to travel and discover where my life might land in a few years.

Tips on where to seriously take a peak in SoCal, for those of you who live out there or go often? Towns and cities to LIVE in, not just visit. I've spent some time in LA and Irvine, but really think I'll end up in San Diego. Any tips, recommendations or things to AVOID, all welcome! DM me! 

MONEY

Because of school starting again in the Fall, which still seems so crazy to me (I don't think it's fully registered in my mind that in just a few months I have to be in "study mode" all over again after a year "off"), I'll be unable to work full time anymore, and therefore - BROKE. So, I've re-entered my old hunt for babysitting and nannying positions and have been overwhelmed with the responses. I have so many offers for the summer, and 2018-2019 school year, that I'm not sure who to work with! I guess that's a good problem to have, right?! On top of that, I've been visiting and considering NEW business opportunities that allow me to FINALLY utilize my social media accounts, my blog and my voice for more than my own pleasure. Some of this involves promotions, ambassador programs and teaming with pretty cool companies...where I can actually get ya'll sick discounts on things, cause we're a team here, right?!?! I'm excited, so updates to come ;) 

LOVE LIFE : 

Yes, I tried to actually date again. Do I think I was ever ready for that? No. And I don't think he thought so, either.

It's been roughly 7 months since I broke up with my ex, and the entire experience, relationship, break up, healing process and all, has easily been the hardest thing that I've ever had to go through. For some people, that probably sounds like a blessing, and I know overall, in this life, I've had it relatively easy thus far. But my therapist always tells me not to undermine or brush off MY experiences just because they're not AS BAD as they could be. She tells me to feel what I feel and allow it to be, and not beat myself up over what feelings there are. So, yes, it's been the hardest thing, and I'm not done going through it. 

I tried dating again because the man in my life was undoubtedly deserving of the effort, the chance, the time. He was and is amazing, and we were and still are good. He was always understanding, open, patient, and still was when I told him how I was feeling. I didn't hide, lie or drag it along, and we respect each other too much to force what just can't happen right now. What's meant to be, will be. And I thank him for everything. 

But I am single, and that is where I need to be. 

I've discovered so much about the woman that I am, both being in, and getting out of the toxic relationship I was in. One of the things I learned along the way was how truly in-touch I am with myself. I am extremely self-aware, and I know how I feel, when I feel it, why I feel it and how I need to process and manage those feelings. I think it's one of my best qualities, to know what I need or want, and why. Right now, and honestly since the break up in October, what I have needed, is to be alone. 

After being smothered and controlled for so long, utterly consumed by unhealthy, possessive "love", the only thing I need and want is me-time. To focus on myself, my future, my goals and dreams. I feel it in my soul, that's the right thing for me. Although I do very much so LOVE men, lmao,  I love looking at them, talking to them, flirting with them, the bottom line is I just don't need one right now. And that's okay! I am happy by myself, I am content, busy and focused. How awesome is that? To be so content and at ease with who I am as a woman, that I am OKAY being alone for right now. A goal we should all aim for, is to be okay alone, before we seek out another.

Of course, I am still a young, 22 year old single woman sooooo I am very open and willing to casually go on dates, or text or chat with new guys, but I just know in my heart that now is not my time for a relationship or love, and I will be the first to admit it. I am holding out for a special one, at the right time, when I am ready. When I'm absolutely healed, not just masking my wounds with a bandaid. Each and every day gets easier, but the bad ones come and go. I will let the heartbreak run it's course, for however long I feel necessary. But it won't be forever, for I believe so deeply in partnership, and long for love again.  I love love more than anything in the world. And I am GOOD at love. I am GOOD at loving and being loved, and I am ecstatic for the opportunity to love another man again some day, one who is safe and honest and good. I am so excited for that chance, again. But it can wait for now. 

I still get messages weekly, about how to move on after a break-up. I don't know why anyone would assume I have all the answers, when I often struggle to find them, myself. But I am honored and absolutely able to share what HAS worked for me, what hasn't, what hurts the most, and what helps ease the pain...if that's something more and more people think I'm able to speak on. If so, that will be my next post. Because we all deserve happiness and healing, no matter who we are and what we've been through. If we all shared our stories and our experiences, we might actually learn a thing or two from each other. I hope I can help someone, you all help me. Happy healing, ya'll. 

Life is good. Talk to you soon :) 

So so so much love, especially to all the mama's today. Mine is the best, though. Love you mama. Happy Mommy's Day <3 

X, Kayla 

 

 

"Just a Peak" : Instagram - Through My Eyes

Happy Super Bowl Sunday! 

First off, I apologize for not writing the past 2 weeks or so. I made the commitment to myself to keep up with this blog, and I fully intend on keeping that promise! However, I also fully intend on only writing and publishing finalized posts when I feel fully inspired, and have the time to sit down and write something that I am proud enough for the public to see. I spend so much time on these little things because I want the people who decide to spend time reading my blog, to appreciate what I write here, what I have to share with you, and actually enjoy reading and looking at things that are worthy!

As enjoyable and relaxing as this outlet is for me, I will always take my writing seriously, and I want these posts to mean something. Both to you, as readers, and me as a content creator. 

Today, I am inspired, so hey, hey! Ya girls baaackkkk! 

I thought I'd introduce a new little series called "Just a Peak". With these posts, I'll share little bits of what I like, allowing ya'll glimpses into what I see, what inspires me, what I look at while I'm glued to my phone, what I see when I walk around in this world, what I hope to see one day. Essentially, a peak into my brain! As if a camera was on my forehead and ya'll were seeing through my eyeballs. SO creepy lol. Black mirror episode, season 4...soon to come :P 

Anyway, for this first little "Just a Peak" post, I thought I'd keep it short and sweet and show you what my IG feed is flooded with. I'll share a handful of posts I've saved, or that particularly stood out to me for whatever the reason. I'll of course, make sure to keep the handle that posted them, visible, because I'll give credit where credit is due, and so you can follow them too! Honestly, that's probably the most essential part of this post - more the creators, photographers, artists, bloggers, writers, musicians, that POST these things, rather than the photos themselves. Because if I could, I'd include EVERY photo these beautiful people have EVER shared, EVER. So go follow all of them! AND MORE! There are SO many more content creators I follow and adore online that I look up to daily. But here's just a few, because I wanted to make sure to save some for future blog posts! 

Why I LOVE Instagram as much as I do...

So, I follow a LOT of people on Instagram. 2,025, at the moment, to be exact.

Instagram is hands down, my favorite social media platform. It's 100% my most clicked on app, the place I spend the most time when I'm on my phone, the place I feel most artistic, creative, and free. I am naturally a visual person, to the core. I love to look at things, lay things out, study them, appreciate them. So a visual app is simply the best, for me. 

I of course, love sharing and posting my own photos on my personal account. I use Instagram as a tool, more than anything else. It is SO much more than a social media platform, in my opinion. I admittedly use it for EVERYTHING, and appreciate and indulge in its ability to expand and inspire, and I adore and crave the opportunity that lies within it's GIANT online database. Instagram is so so so powerful. 

My all time favorite thing about the app, and about social media in general is how much networking and communicating I can do with other people, from all over the world. The opportunities and connections are absolutely endless. You just have to take advantage of all its tools, and all it has to offer.

STAY ACTIVE. REACH OUT. FOLLOW BACK. INTERACT. STAY CONSISTENT. 

I love the freedom on IG, the places it can take you, how versatile, creative and new it continues to be. Instagram is updated frequently, adding new features, keeping the same look and allowing for more artistic freedom, which is such a beautiful thing! I love everything it stands for. I may be in love with a smart phone app..help?

My feed has grown immensely overtime, I'm not quite sure how I got to follow as many people as I do, but so many of the accounts I do follow, I don't even know personally! If I knew 2,000+ people, I think I'd have a heck of a lot more things to do on the weekend lol. I just find new people to love every week and it grows my imagination, creative palette and my visions so much.

Lately, most of what and who I follow, include mass amounts of love, elopement and travel photography, beautiful destinations I wish to visit, wedding inspiration (although I'm single as hell, what girl DOESN'T dream about their future wedding all day, everyday?) fashion, family, animal rescue organizations, human and woman's rights organizations, pop culture, art and tattoos. If you actually "take a peak" into my "saved" feed on IG, it's like a bundle of all that I love, filed away nicely lol, which is exactly what I tried to allow ya to grasp a taste of, in the gallery below. 

These are families I follow, couples I look up to, animal rescue organizations I adore, van life diaries (a HUGE dream of mine is to buy a used van, fix it up and travel the country with someone - I follow a ridiculous amount of these accounts), models, artists, and photographers that wholeheartedly deserve the credit and following that they have. In one way or another, all of these photos and so many more, inspire me. I find a peace of me in each and every one of them, and I could write novels about why, for each. 

...But I won't right now, because I know y'all are probably getting ready for the Super Bowl, and I don't wanna hold ya up too long and try to steal the thunder. JT is performing at halftime, so you know I'll be tuning in ;) 

Take a peak into my IG feed, what I scroll through for hours a day, and you'll understand why I do. 

Instagram is POWERFUL. Use it like it is! It's our viewfinder into the rest of the world, before we're able to see it for ourselves. But best believe, I WILL see it for myself. All of it. 

Happy Sunday! 

X, Kayla